What a difference 3 days makes...

Thank God for Memorial Day Weekend. I was in dire need of a 3 day vacation! No joke. I figured out that I have been travelling every weekend for the past 3 months...EVERY WEEKEND folks...that's a lot of gas and a lot of time spent in a car. No wonder I was cranky. Sorry to those who got to experience the wrath of me.

This time of year is probably the craziest time of year because of graduations, weddings, vacations, family gatherings and did I say weddings? Yea, I've got 6 this year! I think thats all...sometimes my boyfriend will tell me that we were invited to another wedding and I just give him that look of "Are you kidding me? Are YOU kidding ME?"

But luckily for me...and for Blake, I had a 3 day weekend and it was lovely. Relaxing, fun, no errands to run, no places to be, just fun and filled with sleep, food and lots of laughter. That's how I roll...Not...Welcome back to the "real world" Julie...Why is that you hear that a lot after college and when will it stop?? Why can't life just be a beach, instead of another word that sounds a lot like beach if said with a french accent?

Uninvited Guests

What is up with people inviting themselves over for dinner at other people's homes? I recently had a friend ask me if I wanted to hang out...I said sure, and then she said "Ok, why don't you make dinner and I'll come over and hang out." What??

My boyfriend's friend's girlfriend (a lot to take in, I know!) invited herself and friends over to my boyfriend's house for a barbecue that they were hosting, and then requested our presence while we were out for dinner!!

Most recently, a friend of mine just found out (literally 10 minutes ago) that her husband's classmates made lasagna and are bringing it over to HER house! Therefore, she has to go get wine and side items AND dessert!! Not too mention that she has to clean her house before they come over, when really, she wanted to go run errands and work out.

I love people, I really do, but do people have no consideration for other people's schedules?? This was very commonly accepted in college, but not so much in the working world. People got things to do or maybe they just want to relax on the couch, eat a microwave dinner and watch The Office with no interruptions...Is that so much to ask for??

Knick, knack patty...What??

My 2-year-old nephew, Miguel, just learned a new song, "This Old Man," and he sings it soooo well! It goes a little somethin' like this "Dis Ole Man, he play seven, he play knick, knack on my shoe widda knick, knack, paddy wack, nima noma noo, dis ole man came rowing home."

As I was changing his diaper, I thought to myself, "What the heck is a 'Knick, knack, patty wack?'" And "Does the old man die when he plays 7?" And "Why is he giving a dog a bone, when he's playing a knick, knack, patty wack?" AND lastly, "Why does he roll home?" But seriously, why can't he just walk like a normal person??

I looked up "Knick, Knack, Patty Wack" on Urbandictionary.com and I found an interesting answer: What Ludricrous still is even in late 2004 with the release of "Get Back"

"Cause its the knick knack paddy whack still riding cad-E-llacs, family off the street made my homies put the baggies back."

Now, I'm even more confused.

But when you really think about it, which I don't know if anybody really wants to think this hard about children songs, most of those songs are a little violent and odd.

Take for example, Jack and Jill

Jack and Jill went up the hill

To fetch a pail of water.

Jack fell down and broke his crown,

And Jill came tumbling after.

What I'm getting from this twisted song, is that Jack and Jill were forced into child labor by their parents, and in doing so, Jack got a concussion and Jill could have possibly broken her coccyx.

Then there's Humpty Dumpty's story:

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

All the king's horses and all the king's men

Couldn't put Humpty together again.

First they make fun of the poor bloke, by calling him "Humpty Dumpty," which means a short, fat, clumsy man...real nice. And then the poor guy falls and breaks into pieces. ONCE again, showing how mean and violent these nursery rhymes really are!

FOR EXAMPLE:
"Jack be nimble" refers to the yellow fever.
"Georgie, Porgie" refers to sexual harrassment.
"Hey Diddle, Diddle" refers to adultery
"I'm a little teapot" refers to anger management issues
"Little Boy Blue" refers to depression
"I love little Pussy" - enough said

I could keep going, but I'm gonna stop while I'm ahead...

...Dang it, now I'm talking in rhymes!

Top 5 Awkward Moments at Work

1. Sitting in the bathroom stall next to a pooper
- plop, plop...silence...plop!
2. Office Birthdays
- I don't know you, but happy birthday and I'm going to eat your birthday treats.
3. Riding an elevator with mirrors
- Just don't look them in the eye!
4. Walking in late to a meeting with the VP
- Sorry, I didn't get the memo!
5. Running into someone in a hallway and doing a dance with them
- Which way should I move!?